"to dream is not to dream/ if waking up is never finished." (Ed Roberson)
To replace waking with realisation?
had mild panics today. loud morning rush in my hotel. two toilets and one shower
for over twenty people. crowds of faceless nameless people in the centre. stale golabki at the Milky Bar.
So many bad memories of Katowice. Can I crowd out the bad memories with better ones?
It's a new school year. I still don't have a job. Staying in another cheap hotel. It's ok for a while.
Keep moving in circles. Are circles bad? hm . . .
I am back in Rybnik where my Polish journey began. I might be going back to Katowice in October for a job.
It's a circle:
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August/Sep 2006: Rybnik, Poland
Oct-Dec 2006: Katowice
Sep 2007: Rybnik
Oct 2007: Katowice?
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But this time it's gonna be different. No doubt. for better or worse I don't know.
the poet Nate Mackey talks about "ground gone under"
1) I need ground
2) I need the ground to go under
Still searching for ground . . .